📍 Hey, friends. Welcome back to No Silver Spoons. I'm your host, Sarah Beth Herman. Thank you, guys, so much for spending your day with me. I know there are a ton of podcasts you could choose from, and the fact that you're here listening right now means the world to me. So, thanks for being here. We are officially halfway through The Human Side of Leadership, which is our summer series.

And I have to tell you; this has been so much fun. I have had a great time just having conversations with my staff, professors of mine. I'm in my second master's program right now, if you didn't know. And friends of mine, colleagues, clients, so many amazing conversations. And everything we're talking about here has challenged me, and I hope that it has challenged you.

I have been reminded that leadership isn't just about building businesses or growing teams. It has been about becoming the kind of person that other people can trust to follow. This series is also a little bit bittersweet because it is helping us close out season five of No Silver Spoons.

I can hardly believe I'm even saying that. And at the same time, behind the scenes, our team is already hard at work building season six. I genuinely cannot wait to share with you what is ahead. We have been mapping out conversations, bringing in some new ideas, and thinking about how we can continue creating content that doesn't just motivate you for a day, but actually changes the way that you lead for years to come.

As always, this summer series is proudly sponsored by Dentistry Support. Every day, our team has the privilege of partnering with dental practices across the country, helping them strengthen operations, improve revenue cycle management, build healthier teams, and create practices that serve both patients and people well.

One of the greatest gifts of what we do is getting a front row seat to leadership. We don't just see what works on paper, we see what works when real people are leading through real challenges. And that's exactly why I wanted to have today's conversation. Because I think one of the biggest mistakes leaders make isn't a lack of experience.

It isn't a lack of intelligence, and it isn't even a lack of confidence. And maybe you're thinking, "Well, actually, it could be all of those." But today, I want to share with you that I think one of the biggest mistakes we make is spending years trying to become the leader that we admire instead of becoming the leader our people actually need.

We copy leadership styles. We borrow someone else's words. We follow the latest business trend. We even imitate the people who seem successful and quietly convince ourselves that if we could just lead a little bit more like them, then maybe we'd finally become the leader that we were supposed to be

 But what if that's the very thing holding us back? What if your greatest strengths as a leader have nothing to do with becoming more like someone else and, instead everything to do with becoming more comfortable being yourself? That's what we're gonna unpack today. So, let's get into it.

There was a concept I came across recently that I haven't been able to stop thinking about it wasn't because it was a complicated thought, it was actually the opposite. It was really simple. The concept is called The Purple Cow Theory, and it was introduced by bestselling author and marketing expert

seth Godin, in his book Purple Cow: Transform Your Business by Being Remarkable. The idea is built around one simple picture. Imagine you're driving through the countryside, you pass one cow, then another, and after a while you stop noticing them because they're exactly what you would expect to see.

But imagine driving by a purple cow. You'd probably slow down, you'd point it out, you might even pull over and take a picture because you've never seen one before. Not because it was louder, not because it was trying harder, simply because it was different. Godin's point is that in a crowded world, being remarkable doesn't mean being outrageous, it means being worth talking about.

That idea hit me a little differently when I heard Jimmy Donaldson, better known as MrBeast, talk about it. Now, whether you're a fan of YouTube or not really doesn't matter here. What matters is this: MrBeast is the largest individual creator on YouTube.

He became the first person in the platform's history to surpass 500 million subscribers, and YouTube even created a one-of-a-kind custom play button to recognize the milestone because no creator had ever reached it before. Think about that for just a minute. Half a billion people. That's a number that almost is impossible to wrap your head around.

When someone asked him what separates the content that gets a few thousand views from content that gets 100 million views, he didn't start talking about algorithms. He didn't start talking about expensive cameras or even marketing. He actually brought up the purple cow. He said a huge part of creating something people remember is asking one question: "Have people seen this before?"

And if the answer is yes, keep working because people remember what is different. And when I heard that, I wasn't thinking about YouTube or influencing or anything along those lines, I was actually thinking about leadership and my own brands. Because I wonder if we've accidentally convinced ourselves that great leadership comes from blending in.

We read the same books, we use the same phrases, we run the same kind of meetings, we quote the same people. We keep looking around the room and asking, "What is everybody else doing?" Instead of asking, "What kind of leader do my people actually need me to become?" And those two questions are completely different.

I don't think that your team is hoping that you'll become the next famous leadership speaker. I don't think that they're hoping you'll walk into work sounding like somebody they watched on YouTube. I think that their hope- Hoping that you'll become predictable in all the right ways. That they know you'll tell them the truth. That you will have the difficult conversation instead of avoiding it. That you'll celebrate wins without needing the credit. That when things get difficult, your character, it won't change. Those are remarkable qualities, and not because they're flashy, but because those are actually rare.

We live in a world that rewards performance, and leadership, it only requires presence. Those are not the same thing. I've met leaders who could command a stage in front of thousands of people and struggle to make one employee feel valued. It's shocking. It really is if you think about it. But I've also met leaders who would never want a microphone in their hand.

Their teams would follow them anywhere because trust had been earned one conversation at a time. And that influence, it never goes viral. It doesn't show up in a highlight reel. , It's the kind that changes organizations. There's another quote from Seth Godin that I think fits this conversation perfectly.

" In a crowded marketplace, fitting in is failing. In a busy marketplace, not standing out is the same as being invisible." Most people read that as marketing advice. Most people listen to that as marketing advice. Did you? I'm gonna read it one more time. " In a crowded marketplace, fitting in is failing. In a busy marketplace, not standing out is the same as being invisible."

The goal isn't to become different for the sake of attention. The goal is to become unmistakably authentic. There is only one person who has your experiences, your perspective, your story, your mistakes, lessons, your way of encouraging people, your way of even solving problems. And your team doesn't need a copy of someone else.

They need the version of you that's no longer afraid to stop performing. I think one of the greatest compliments a leader could ever receive is not, "You are brilliant."

Instead, it's, "You're the same person in every room." Because consistency is actually what builds trust, and trust actually builds influence, and influence is what leadership has always been about. So, if being the purple cow isn't about being louder, if it isn't about being the biggest personality, if it isn't about becoming somebody else, then what does that actually look like on an ordinary Tuesday when you're leading your team, running your practice, or building your business?

That's where I want to leave you today. If there's one thing I hope you remember from today's conversation, it's this: I want you to stop asking, "How can I become more like them?" More like blank, more like her, more like him, more like them. And start asking, "How can I become more fully the leader my people need from me?"

Learn from great leaders. Study them. Read their books. Listen to their podcasts. Sit in rooms where you can grow, but don't confuse learning with becoming. The world doesn't need another copy. Your team, they don't need another copy. They need someone that they can trust, someone who shows up the same way on an ordinary Tuesday as they do when everything is going well.

Confidence, it doesn't have to be loud. Character rarely is. Consistency will always outlast charisma, and trust will always create more influence than performance. Maybe your purple cow isn't doing something nobody has ever done before. Maybe it's simply having the courage to lead in a way that's authentically yours.

Thank you so much for joining me today on another episode of No Silver Spoons. We are officially halfway through the Human Side of Leadership summer series, which means we have five incredible episodes still ahead before we wrap up this season five. And I have to tell you, our team is already deep into planning season six, and I truly believe it's going to be our strongest season yet.

This summer has been about understanding ourselves as leaders, how we think, communicate, build trust, navigate relationships, and lead people well. Season six is where we begin putting those lessons into action. We'll move into conversations about building sustainable businesses, creating a meaningful impact, making courageous decisions, and leading with both purpose and practical strategy.

I can't wait to share it with you. If today's conversation encouraged you, challenged you, or made you think differently, would you do me a favor and share this episode with one person who comes to mind? The best leadership conversations rarely end when the podcast does.

They continue in team meetings, coffee shops, car rides, and around dinner tables. Until next week, remember, your next move matters. Make it with intention.  📍 I'll see you next Monday on No Silver Spoons