Welcome back to No Silver Spoons.   This is the podcast where we talk real leadership This podcast is where we talk about real leadership and the kind that doesn't come from these perfect conditions. It actually comes from showing up every single day with courage and intention and heart,  and just being authentically you. I am Sarah Beth Herman, and today's episode is something that I believe every single leader  and every single remote or in-person person needs to hear.

I wanna talk about creating urgency without creating and causing anxiety. The truth for me is that urgency is not the enemy. Anxiety is, and you can build. I

welcome back to no silver spoons. This podcast is where we talk about real leadership and the kind that we know doesn't come from perfect conditions. The kind that comes from showing up every single day with  intentionality, heart, and a raw and realness that helps us form future generations of leaders.

I'm Sarah Beth Herman,  today I wanna talk about something that every single leader, either remote or in person, needs to hear. And you know, just as much as I know that the remote world is expanding. And so one day soon you may be supporting a virtual team. Maybe you already do,   but it's going to happen either way.

  And I want you to hear this episode so loud and clear. Today we're gonna talk about creating urgency without causing anxiety. And the truth for me is that urgency isn't the enemy. Anxiety is.   you can build, drive, focus 

and momentum  without burning out your team. But to do that, you need to understand the difference between useful stress and distress. One builds teams, the other breaks them. And today we're gonna talk about that tension, how to lead with urgency, especially in a remote setting  without creating a culture 

of

fear or emotional fatigue.  now I will tell you that even if you have in-person team members.   there is an element of the remote world that you bring in to an in-person team as well. So you're gonna learn things in today's episode that are really gonna help you in even your direct face-to-face communication, your texting communication, your email communication, whatever that looks like.

  Now if you are completely remote, this is also going to teach you ways that you can shift your thinking and actually guide your team how you want them to learn to respond to you.   Let's start with something foundational. Stress and leadership is not one dimensional. There is a difference here, so let's talk Distress.

 Distress, the negative, corrosive kind. It's fueled by self-doubt, poor communication and confusion. And this leads to that overthinking, the exhaustion, the silence, distress spreads as shared anxiety, right?   Eustress the good kind.   it's motivating. It's driven by self-confidence, clear direction. It sharpens focus.

It creates a shared urgency.   Have you ever had that before with your team? That dynamic where even if you are stressed, your team. They have a stress to them, but it's not this like negative, holy cow, we're not gonna make it through this situation. They instead are focused. They're like, okay, this is the issue.

We're gonna get through it. Let's go fight win.   Do you have that?   Do you not   consider that for just a second?   A 2025 report from Remote Leadership Institute found that 64%  of remote employees say their productivity drops when urgency is delivered with unclear expectations. Meanwhile, teams that reported high psychological safety and intentional communication   and intentional communication were 47% more likely to hit quarterly goals.

  So as a leader. I think your job isn't to remove stress, it's to shape it.   Would you agree?

  Now, distress shows up in a lot of different ways,   but you can't always see it, especially on a Zoom meeting or a teams meeting.   But here's how it shows up.   Silence on calls,   short or cold Slack or teams messages.   Passive communication   over apologizing or avoiding feedback   that over apologizing can be something like, Hey, I'm sorry for bothering you, but blank,   or I'm sorry to interrupt you.

I know you're super busy, but blank.   Team members freezing instead of moving forward.   I've got a story for you.   Not long ago we were in a rough season at dentistry Support. Now our business is constantly evolving, constantly growing. I have massive goals for us,   and in order to stay on that trajectory,  we have factored in.

  What our average pattern of loss in clients is what our average pattern of growth is in clients, and we factor in the losses with the gains, so we know what trajectory we need to be on every single month. We know what tasks have to be done in order for us to overcome the losses and also have gains.   We had lost several clients at one time, and one of our newer team members had just gotten on a call with me and she broke down in tears.

She was completely overwhelmed because she was new in her position, not new to the company,  but she felt the pressure and she felt the pressure in a way that it was like, Hey, I'm new in this position, but I'm failing the company because we're losing clients.   What she didn't know in that call with me is that I'm not mad that we lose a client.

It's not an emotional thing for me.   Yes, it does have an impact on what I think about the trajectory of our business when we have a loss, but I always look at a loss as an opportunity, like if we've had a really rough week at work, I consider that a success.   Because I've learned things I didn't know about my company and I can't possibly know everything about my company, no matter how type A I might be, no matter what my team says to me or what they don't say to me.

I can't know everything. I can't be in everything all at once.   So I'm not mad when we lose a client.   What matters to me when we lose a client is how we recover.   So we talked through it. We set some smart goals, we outlined better processes. She left that call with a clear, I guess you could say, path forward.

She had a different kind of confidence. She was empowered.   Those moments with your team, when they know things aren't going wrong, they can go one of two ways   deeper into distress or forward into growth.   It all comes down to how we communicate. In an urgent matter, in an urgent situation, in a really tumultuous session that we're having, how are we talking to people?

How do we communicate what's going on?   Is your team worried that they're making you angry, or do they know that every time something tough happens, this is a redirect opportunity? Now, I'm not saying I don't get mad at work, I don't get frustrated at work that's inhuman to try to say that I'm something I'm not.

  What I am telling you is that every time something hard happens, it doesn't mean we have to go cry in the back. What it means is we have to learn to look at our situation as a whole and figure out how to teach our teens to see it as an opportunity to redirect, to recover, to change future outcomes, because we spent time today addressing our issues.

  So here's how I want you to learn to cultivate urgency without breaking trust.   Take notes if you can. If not,   pause here, grab a notebook and then take notes   or listen to the whole thing and then listen to it one more time.   The first thing I want you to hear is  tone is everything   in remote work, tone is your body language.

People will mirror your emotional energy. I. If you are frantic, if you are passive aggressive, your team is internalizing it.   This goes for your home too.   I know this podcast is all about business,   but much of what you learn here can be applied in your home,   to your friends,  to your family.   So a little pro tip from me.

  Use warm, confident voices when you're giving direction.   You can be urgent.   And calm at the same time.   Number two, give context before direction. This is one of my absolute favorite approaches.   Now, sometimes people will tell me it takes too long to say all the things you wanted to say, and I'm direct and to the point.

That's great. I love that you're direct and to the point,   but being direct also means that you know how to set expectations.   If you jump out the gate and you're a direct person, but that person you're coaching doesn't receive direct feedback, well,   you need to learn to modify your approach.   So instead of saying something like this needs to be done, ASAP,   I like to start with something like,   here's why.

What we're gonna talk about matters. We are closing the loop for a client who has trusted us for the last six months,   and I know you're the right person to handle it.

  We need to revamp the SOPs for this client in order to make this all work the way it needs to work.   I'm gonna give you a set of instructions and I'm gonna need that completed by Friday at 3:00 PM   The client is expecting this on Monday morning, but I'd like to have the weekend to review this and to make sure it's all good to go.

  Are you good with that?   the context of what I just said. It actually fuels confidence. It doesn't fuel panic.   The person has been built up. I've explained to them what we're trying to accomplish, what I'm gonna need them to do. I've given them a time bound deadline. Hey, I need to send by here because of this,   I'm not just telling them part of the information and gatekeeping something in the event that I might give them too much information.

  Number three,   acknowledge the weight.   Acknowledge the weight. Acknowledge the weight. I'm saying it three times on purpose.   You can say, I know this is a heavy lift, or this week might feel intense.   When you acknowledge pressure, it creates a partnership with other people that you work with every single day.

  Number four, schedule listening windows,   so not just update meetings, listening time.   This is open space for people to ask questions, to vent, or to clarify expectations.   This is where distress gets converted into eustress.

  Number five, train active listening company-wide. Make it part of your culture. Teach your team to paraphrase instructions to summarize next steps to clarify before taking action.   This reduces that ambiguity that is often the source of stress and remote work.   At dentistry Support my largest brand. We have evolved in how we communicate.

  Meetings are pretty rare for us, and that's intentional, but when we do meet, it matters.   We use internal podcast episodes for training, typed memos with bulleted expectations. Chats that are for internal purposes only. We have separated out the kind of chats we have. We have ticketing systems to solve problems.

We have video updates that have clarity in them, a little bit of warmth added.  we avoid unneeded meetings, not because we don't want connection,  but because we want to respect everyone's focus. I.   Still, we had to address something though. The meeting stigma when you don't meet often people can fear meetings when they do happen, so we had to retrain our team's mindset that meetings aren't bad news.

They're safe spaces for growth, strategy and support.   Recent studies show that teams with high emotional safety and stress literacy, they outperform others by 37% on project deadlines, and that's from Harvard Remote Workforce studies   leaders who are consistent in tone, visible praise and expectation actually reduce employee anxiety up to 41%.

  And employees who feel prepared are 60% more likely to respond to urgency with motivation instead of paralysis. So those onboarding meetings, the onboarding process of a new client or customer,   the way that you choose to follow the flow of things, that is creating preparedness,   and you are teaching your team through preparedness.

  That they can  achieve a 60% more likelihood  to respond to urgency with motivation instead of that paralysis.   So the translation here is that urgency is a leadership art form.   When it is done right, it builds loyalty, trust, and movement.   So as we close out this episode, let's go over our, that's good moment.

  Where we wrap up the most important things from the episode that you can take with you   as you go, lead others.   One. Urgency is not the enemy. Anxiety is you don't have to scare people into results. You can inspire them there.   Two distress it spreads like smoke.   If your tone is stressed, if your messages are cold, if your energy is chaotic, your team will carry that weight.

  Number three, eustress is where growth lives. Use it, cultivate it, talk about it. Turn pressure into purpose.   And number four, leadership is emotional architecture. Design your culture to feel safe, not suffocating. Clear communication is your blueprint.

  Your that's good moment today should end with this quote. Urgency built on clarity breeds energy. Urgency built on confusion breeds fear.   Choose your foundation wisely.  if today's episode gave you something to think about, I'd love to hear from you. Screenshot the episode and tag me on Instagram at No Silver Spoons Podcast and tell me how you lead with urgency.

  Thank you for tuning in to this episode of No Silver Spoons.  And remember, no one hands us success. We build it with grit, heart, and a whole lot of intention. I'll catch you guys on the next episode.